Dear Accidentally Qualified: Motivation And Having Fun

“Accidentally Qualified” is a new advice column from Study Hall written by Sonia Weiser, a freelance journalist and the founder of the journalism opportunities newsletter, “Opportunities of the Week.” Questions can be submitted through our anonymous form for consideration: https://forms.gle/pwUbNgwTBaGKATyu5. 

WORK

Dear Accidentally Qualified: 

How do you stay motivated and consistent with writing? And how do you know that your writing is improving? I am just starting out with writing as a freelancer, and I generally feel dissatisfied with the quality of my writing, and I would like to know if there are any tips to kill the voice of self-criticism and to keep pushing through. 

-Woeful Noob

Dear Woeful Noob: 

Ira Glass refers to this as the taste gap: the period when you can recognize quality but can’t yet produce work that matches your standards. He says, “Everybody I know who does interesting, creative work goes through years where they had really good taste and they could tell that what they were making wasn’t as good as they wanted it to be. They knew it fell short. Everybody goes through that.”

It’s a truly miserable state of limbo to be stuck in, and often the reason people abandon things they aren’t naturally good at: it’s humiliating to be a beginner. Not just a beginner. A talentless fetus. I rarely try new things because I don’t have the confidence or the humility to repeatedly eat shit. 

But the fact that you know you can do better and are actively trying to improve puts you ahead of all the people who have made peace with their own mediocrity or worse, can’t see that their output is trash. So rather than silencing the self-criticism, use it to your advantage. Push yourself until you read something you wrote and think “this is actually pretty good.” Because you will get there. Maybe for now, one out of every five of your ideas is worth pitching. Or one out of every ten paragraphs has merit. Scrap your mediocre ideas (we all have them), and put the ones that you know have legs, but you don’t feel ready to tackle quite yet on the backburner. Go with your gut. Only you know what will make you proud of yourself. 

This is also the time to find your coterie of reliable sounding boards (C.o.R.S). This should be professionals whose opinion you respect: former classmates, editors you’ve become familiar with, friends in the industry, or more successful writers who have demonstrated an interest in helping out those on their way up. Not to be confused with overly-supportive peers (O.S.P) or patronizing elders (P.E), your C.o.R.S are your personal sieve for brain dumps or works in progress. They are the people whose tastes you admire, whose career paths you aspire to. They are the people who will save you from yourself. 

So for now, take on assignments where the employer’s expectations and demands could be met in your sleep and turn those into opportunities to build your confidence. Listicles, Q&As where the interviewee’s words do the heavy lifting, copy for people’s Airbnb listings or a “love story” for someone’s wedding website. Your family newsletter. Be the absolute best at something that requires the absolute least. Learn how to self-edit, model your writing on the writing that inspires you, play with language in new and exciting ways. And eventually the space between talent and taste will get smaller and smaller. 

LIFE

Dear Accidentally Qualified: 

I’m 22. I have a stable(-ish) income, and can afford to do some stuff. What are some things that fit best within the 20-30 yrs range, for best memory dividends? Especially things that I might easily be chasing now that really don’t fit best into this time of my life…

-Thnks fr th Mmrs 

Dear Thnks fr th Mmrs: 

I don’t know if you’ve seen the musical Rent, but this screams “how do you measure, measure a life?” Why does it matter if something you’re doing stays with you for longer than a minute (or 525,600 of them)? You’re in your twenties. This is exactly when you should be doing all the things that you don’t want to remember when you’re older. Want to know what I did in my twenties? Like many people, I spiraled. 

You also can never predict what experiences are going to stick with you and what aren’t. Sometimes the memories with the most staying power are the most idiotic or quotidian. I remember kicking a classmate in the balls in 4th grade and not understanding why it hurt him so much. Or how in preschool, when we could choose a Cinderella activity to do, I chose cleaning (which honestly tracks). Or how I once dropped a bag of frozen tortillas on my foot and it made my toe bleed.   

Point being, these are not things I did with the intention of creating memories. They just happened and here we are. 

There’s a reason you hear older people say, “I don’t know why I remember that” so often. Because the things that have clung to the sides of their brain are often arbitrary. And there’s a reason people say they can’t remember some of the most momentous times of their lives. My friend told me she doesn’t remember the entire first year following the birth of her twins. Or how often have you heard newlyweds describe their wedding day as a “blur?” 

Do the things you want to do at the moment. See a movie that you know won’t change your life. Attend a concert because it’s free and tonight. Go to a yard sale and spend $100 on something you absolutely don’t need (you have the money!). Try a flavor of ice cream because it’s a horrible color and you want to know if it tastes as gross as it looks. Ask a home brewer about what’s new in beer. Spend time with the Dave Matthews Band back catalog. Make a total mess of things. 

So find a bar. Forget who you are. (It’s another Rent reference.) 

-Sonia

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